His mind and body were discovered
During her ongoing extensive search
For objects that might at some point
Disastrously impact with her planet
Yekaterina Alexeyevna a.k.a. Catherine the Great
Had her work cut out for her, she being female and all.
We’re talking 18th century here; Europe one big boy’s club
Till she strides in; no need man up, already here and at home.
Such effrontery seemed to bigoted sexist rulers beyond reason.
Rattled their cages but they’re scared of openly rattling sabres.
Still their sick lies and innuendoes remain today chapter and verse.
To coin a phrase they said, “She’d happily look a gift horse in the cock.”
This was written as a contribution to The Secret Keeper’s Weekly Writing Prompt No. 12.
GIFT | COIN | VERSE | WORK | REASON
I spotted her lurking in the shadows,
doing her best, sneakily, to blend in.
Not an adder, a grass snake; not a threat.
Like hell! A snake in the grass – dangerous
– slithering in close when your guard is down.
Uninvited, unwanted, not by me.
Faceless, limbless, beady eyes, pointed fangs.
“Abnormal, unnatural,” I murmured.
Too much like something met in a nightmare.
Temptation? An exquisite punishment?
I remembered Eden. “Can’t be trusted.
Eden, a plot, a trick. Caught! Shamed! Cast out!”
I looked again. I shuddered in disgust.
I felt the taste of vomit in my throat,
picked up a stick and began to beat it.
Started snarling in time as each blow fell.
“Abnormal!” (WHACK!) “Unnatural!” (WHACK!)
“Snake!” (WHACK!) “Viper!” (WHACK!)
“Bitch!” (WHACK!) “Whore!” (WHACK)
“Slut!” (WHACK!) “Tramp!” (WHACK!)
It wasn’t much now, just an ugly smear.
I realised I was quite out of breath.
“But not as out of breath as you,” I sneered.
Hit it once more for luck, smirked and walked on.
I realised I must have drifted off.
Shook my head. “Daydream. Too many whiskies.”
I looked around the room. She was still there.
“Nice tits. I wonder whether she’d like a drink.”
The secret gender war.